Chapter Two (scroll down for chapter one)

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, yes. These two evil creatures invaded my life. And without an invitation. One dark night I was sleepily putting my pajamas on when I brushed some “lint” off of my sleeve. The lint scurried all over me, and when I felt it traveling on my arm in a threatening manner I flicked it off of my startled self. With a little aa–aaaa AAAgh I peered to the floor and lo and behold this disgusting, offensive Scorpion (the name alone sounds awful) stared back, in full attack stance. Chimi immediately charged at it, I tried to pull Chimi away, got scratched for my effort, all the while my knight in khaki shorts retrieved something with the purpose of disposing of the offender. He did. Not even two days passed that I was visiting the neighbor at her doorstep and saw what you see in the second picture…only it wasn’t motionless. In fact, it was slithering around a chicken, who was curiously (and stupidly) pecking at it. I announced to the neighbor, Carmen, that there was a snake in her yard and she proceeded to freak out, yelling and running around while biting her fingertips and proclaiming that she was too afraid to kill it. I started yelling for someone to get me a machete, but what I got instead was a long, awkward, skinny pole. The angle I had to hit the snake was horrible but I gave it my best and accomplished nothing more than smashing his belly only hard enough for the snake to slither into a mess of banana trunks. We waited around hoping it hadn’t escaped our notice, when the perpetrator’s head popped out of the trunks. I seized the opportunity and whacked away, all the while Carmen continued her screaming and clawing at my shirt, which didn’t help the whacking strategies. The snake was disabled by the time Ivania, Carmen’s daughter, brought me the machete. NOW that the snake was disabled Carmen took the pole and dented the snake’s head, finishing him off. Whiew. That, my friends, is what builds up the ire in me when people say, “Pshsh. You’re ‘suffering for Jesus’ over there in paradise huh?” Ladies, I would like a show of comments from those of you who consider snakes, scorpions, bats, gigantic beatles, relentless mosquitoes, sand mites, seven months of mud a year, tarantulas, frogs in the house, and stray vicous dogs parasidical. Now. I’m not complaining. We love our life here because we know this is where God wants us, oh and the beaches and sunsets are nice too. But I just want to clarify that it’s not all peachy all the time. So now you know.
I will post another fun chapter tomorrow, but first, allow me to encourage you in that the Lord is sovereign and his grace is sufficient whether we face hardships or victories. All glory is his forever and ever…especially when scorpions don’t sting and snakes don’t bite…= )